Revolution of Love.com
Intro to Attachment Parenting (AP)
by Bobbi
Attachment Parenting is a style of parenting in which a mother/father create a strong bond with their baby by caring for them in a more natural or instinctive way with three main goals in mind: to know your child, to help your child feel right and to enjoy parenting.
These goals are achieved by a number of elements, including:
- Taking an active part in the educating yourself and planning a natural (as possible) birth experience.
- Connecting and bonding early with your baby, including rooming-in with your baby if you are at a hospital or birthing center.
- Learning to read and respond to your baby's cues rather than letting them "cry it out".
- Breastfeeding your baby.
- Wearing your baby as much as possible using a sling or baby carrier.
- Sharing sleep with your baby whether in your bed or in a crib next to your bed.
Brian and I believe strongly in attached parenting and we believe it helps a parent live out their vocation as a parent more fully because it takes much love, patience, and self-less giving. However, parents should decide which level of attachment works for their family. For example, some parents do not feel comfortable sleeping with their baby but they do enjoy using a "co-sleeper" next to their bed. Or a single mother may have to return to work, in which case she may ask the caregiver to wear the baby in the sling and feed the baby her expressed breast milk in a bottle until she returns home.
It is also important to remember that some things are out of your control and you shouldn't feel guilty about it. Brian and I planned for a natural childbirth with the expectation to bond with our child immediately but an unexpected premature birth kept Bella out of my arms and in an incubator for over a week. Bonding took a lot longer for me to achieve (see related article: When Bonding Doesn't Happen Right Away) and breastfeeding was extremely difficult since Bella wouldn't breastfeed unless I was wearing a nipple shield (which slows down the production of milk, making breastfeeding more difficult.) We did what we could - pumping milk around the clock to increase volume and we used the sling/co-sleeping to encourage bonding. In the end the bonding came, the cue-reading fell into place, and the three of us have a strong bond that grows deeper each day.
To learn more about attached parenting we recommend the following:
Articles:
Attachment Parenting Index
from Ask Dr. Sears.com
Books:
The Baby Book
by William Sears, MD, and Martha Sears, RN
The Attachment Parenting Book : A Commonsense Guide to Understanding and Nurturing Your Baby
by William Sears, MD, and Martha Sears, RN